Helpful Information

Whether you have received a terminal diagnosis, someone you love is nearing the end of their life, or you are navigating the loss of someone close to you, it is completely natural to feel overwhelmed. You don't need to make every decision today, and you don't have to navigate this on your own.

Here you'll find a few thoughtful questions and practical ideas to help you consider what matters most, one step at a time.

Questions Worth Sitting With

There's no right way to plan a farewell — but a few honest questions can help the right shape emerge.

What do you most want the people you love to know — about you, about them or about what mattered most in your time together?
Who truly needs to be there? Is there anyone whose presence, or absence would leave something unfinished?
What tone feels true? Celebration, quiet reflection, humour, tears — most farewells hold several of these at once. Which matters most here?
Is there anything left unsaid? A thank you, an apology, a story never told, is there space needed for that?
What role should ritual, tradition, or spirituality play, if any? Is there a version of this that's entirely personal, with no set formula?
What do you want people to feel when they leave? If this is a living funeral, what do you want to feel yourself, while you're still able to feel it?

There are no wrong answers. These are simply a place to begin.

Practical ideas

Start with a list, not a plan. Before logistics, write down the people, moments and things that matter. The plan can follow later.
Capture voices while there's time. A recorded message, letter, card or video for someone — a child, a future grandchild, a friend can matter more than any part of the ceremony itself.
Build in pauses. Living funerals especially can carry a lot of emotional weight in one sitting. A short break, a change of room or simply permission to step outside can help.
Offer roles gently, without obligation. Some people want to read or speak, others just want to be present. Asking rather than assuming protects everyone's comfort.
Separate the practical from the personal. Keeping logistics (accounts, wishes, passwords, who-to-tell lists) in one place, separate from the emotional planning frees up energy for the parts that matter most. (This is part of what Things, Together is designed to hold.)
Revisit, don't finalise too early. Wishes and feelings can shift. Treating the plan as something that can evolve, rather than something to lock in once tends to reduce regret later.